Inflating a Dog Screenplay
Chapter 7: Everybody Needs a Friend (in which Patti says, ďanything you want, just askĒ)
by Eric Kraft
Inflating a Dog on Film

The screen rights are available.
E-mail Alec ďNickĒ Rafter.

INT. THE MALT SHOP. The malt shop has been around for generations, but its glory days passed long ago.
PETER
(using a local slang term)
This is really inflated, coming here. 
PATTI
Yeah.
PETER
None of the other kids would come here.
PATTI
Thatís why we come here, isnít it?
PETER
You mean so nobody sees you with me?
PATTI
(that provocative pout)
No .†.†. I mean so I can have you to myself.
PETER
Your little friend.
PATTI
(sweet and honest)
Everybody needs a friend.
Peter looks around.  The shop is still, hushed, and almost empty except for the two of them and the leering soda jerk.
PETER
You know, my mother used to come here.
PATTI
Did she?
PETER
All the kids did.  Thatís what she says.  It was a date.
PATTI
It was?
PETER
Under the right circumstances.
PATTI
Your mother told you that?
PETER
(distractedly)
Yeah.
PATTI
Is something bothering you?
PETER
Yeah.  Something.
PATTI
What?
PETER
Something .†.†. personal.
PATTI
(touching his arm)
Tell me.
PETER
(wringing his hands)
Iíve been wondering whether my mother .†.†. my mother .†.†. and boys .†.†.
PATTI
Oh.  That.  Itís a shock, isnít it?
PETER
(thinking: Does she know something?)
A shock?
PATTI
When you first think about your mother .†.†. and boys.  Itís a shock, right?
She tilts her head and raises her eyebrows.  Peter would agree with anything she said.
PETER
It sure is.  Itís a shock.
PATTI
(giggles)
Just think about what you want from me.
PETER
What?  I .†.†.
She leans toward Peter and gives him both the knowing wink and the provocative pout.  The soda jerk drops a glass.
PATTI
Just think about what you want to do with me.
PETER
(doing precisely that)
Uh-huh.
PATTI
Now think about your mother sitting right here where Iím sitting, and some boy sitting right where youíre sitting, and that boy wanting to do with your mother what you want to do with me.
PETER
(stunned, startled)
Huh.
PATTI
And maybe he did. 
An idea comes to Peter so suddenly that he announces its arrival as if heís won a prize.
PETER
Iíve got an idea!
PATTI
Yeah, Iíll bet you do.
PETER
(like a mad scientist)
Iím going to take a trip into the past.
PATTI
Youíve got a time machine?
PETER
(modestly, as if he might)
No.  An imaginary trip, like a play .†.†. or a thought experiment in science.  I want to see what I can find out about whether .†.†. if .†.†. if my father .†.†. might not be my father.
PATTI
So thatís what this is all about.
PETER
Come with me .†.†. and play my mother.
PATTI
Your mother? Who are you going to play?
PETER
Dudley Beaker, who might be my father
PATTI
You are a little pervert!
PETER
Will you do it?
PATTI
(winking the knowing wink)
Sure.  Weíre friends.  Anything you want .†.†. just ask.
CUT TO:
INFLATING A DOG SCREENPLAY | CONTENTS | CHAPTER 8

Candi Lee Manning and Alec "Nick" RafterHere are a couple of swell ideas from Eric Kraft's vivacious publicist, Candi Lee Manning.
 

You'll find more swell ideas from Candi Lee here.

 
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Copyright © 2001 by Eric Kraft
Registered with the Writers Guild of America East in 2001 

The screenplay for Inflating a Dog is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents, dialogues, settings, and businesses portrayed in it are products of the authorís imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. 

All rights reserved. No part of this teleplay may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. 

The illustration at the top of the page is an adaptation of an illustration by Stewart Rouse that first appeared on the cover of the August 1931 issue of Modern Mechanics and Inventions. The boy at the controls of the aerocycle doesnít particularly resemble Peter Leroyóexcept, perhaps, for the smile.

 
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ABOUT THE PERSONAL HISTORY
COMPONENTS OF THE WORK
REVIEWS OF THE ENTIRE WORK
AUTHORíS STATEMENT

LITTLE FOLLIES
HERB íNí LORNA
RESERVATIONS RECOMMENDED
WHERE DO YOU STOP?
WHAT A PIECE OF WORK I AM
AT HOME WITH THE GLYNNS
LEAVING SMALLíS HOTEL
INFLATING A DOG
PASSIONATE SPECTATOR
MAKING MY SELF
A TOPICAL GUIDE

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