Inflating a Dog Screenplay
Chapter 8: Attainable (in which Patti says, “I’d like to meet your mother”)
by Eric Kraft
Inflating a Dog on Film

The screen rights are available.
E-mail Alec “Nick” Rafter.

EXT. NIGHT. A FEW NIGHTS LATER. IN FRONT OF DUDLEY BEAKER’S HOUSE ON NO BRIDGE ROAD. Peter is waiting for Patti. He sees her turn the corner, walking through the circle of streetlamp light.  She has dressed in the style of his mother’s 1940s high-school days, with saddle shoes, bobby socks, a flippy skirt, and a sweater over a white blouse.
PETER
(when Patti reaches him)
How did you do this?  This outfit?
PATTI
Research.  Rummaging.  The attics of Babbington are full of relics.
She turns and looks at the house. 
PATTI (CONT’D.)
So this is the place?
PETER
Well, maybe.
PATTI
Maybe?
PETER
Oh, it’s Dudley’s house . . . but whether I was conceived here . . .
PATTI
Oh, I get you.
PETER
(indicates the house next door)
That’s my grandparents’ house . . . where my mother grew up. . . . 
(shows the key and starts toward Dudley’s door)
Well . . .
PATTI
(puts her hand on his arm)
Uh-uh.  Let’s do this right.  You go in.  Get into the part.  I’m going to walk around the block, and when I come back and knock at the door it’s going to be a night before you were born, and you’re going to be Dudley and I’m going to be . . . what’s your mother’s name?
PETER
Ella.
PATTI
I’m going to be Ella.
CUT TO:
INT. DUDLEY’S BEDROOM.  Peter rummages through Dudley’s closet and chooses a tweed jacket.
CUT TO:
INT. DUDLEY’S LIVING ROOM. Peter sits in Dudley’s chair in front of the fireplace and waits.  Time passes, more time than he had expected to have to wait. 
He goes to the front door and looks out. 
Patti is at the curb, flirting with a couple of guys in a car.  Peter can’t hear them.  He draws a deep breath.
PETER
(whispering)
Come here.  Please come here.
Patti hugs herself, gives an exaggerated shiver, and indicates that she is on her way to Dudley’s house.
Peter is pleased and surprised. 
The car goes off without Patti and she turns and opens the gate and starts up the walk.
Peter feels thrilled, nervous, eager.
He dashes to his chair and takes his seat.
When Patti rings the bell he gets up as if he hadn’t been expecting her, goes to the door and opens it.
She is there, smiling and hugging a notebook to her chest.
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Ella!
PATTI, AS ELLA
Hi, Dud.  Will you help me with my homework?
PETER, AS DUDLEY
(packing his pipe)
Well, it has been quite a long time since I did any homework, but of course I’ll help you.  Come in, my dear.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Thanks.
PETER, AS DUDLEY
(closing the door)
What homework do you have to do?
PATTI, AS ELLA
(oops, she doesn’t know)
I . . .
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Do you . . . um . . . have to . . . ah . . . write an essay?
PATTI, AS ELLA
Yep.  That’s it.  Gotta write an essay.
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Well!  I can help you with that.
Impulsively, she grasps his hands.
PATTI, AS ELLA
I knew you could.
PETER, AS DUDLEY
I’m flattered that you came to me.  I do know quite a bit about writing essays, what with my having gone to college and all, and . . .
PATTI, AS ELLA
Solid, Jackson!
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Ah, yes. . . . Solid. . . . Jackson.
(then, almost lecherously)
Why don’t we . . . ah . . . go up to my study and see about that essay?
PATTI, AS ELLA
Okay.  Let’s go.
He sweeps his arm toward the stairs.  She starts up.  He lags behind so that he can look up her skirt.
CUT TO:
INT. DUDLEY’S STUDY.
PATTI, AS ELLA
So this is your study!
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Yeah.  I mean, Yes.
She walks around, swinging her little hips, poking at things, then stops at the window and looks out into the darkness.
PATTI, AS ELLA
That house next door . . .
PETER, AS DUDLEY
Your house.
PATTI, AS ELLA
(giggles)
Oh.  Of course it’s my house.
She leans forward, toward the window, her skirt riding up so that Dudley-played-by-Peter can see a bit of the backs of her legs above her knees, and peers into the darkness.
PATTI, AS ELLA (CONT’D.)
That window, what room is that?
He goes to her side and in a friendly way puts his arm around her waist as he leans to peer into the dark.
PETER, AS DUDLEY
(a sudden realization)
That . . . is your bedroom.
She turns from the window, toward him, and he relishes the brushing caress of her breasts.  Her eyes are teasing.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Why, Dud.  What do you study up here?
PETER, AS DUDLEY
(surprising himself)
Beauty.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Meaning me?
PETER, AS DUDLEY
There are nights when I sit here with the lights out, hoping that you will come up to your room.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Wouldn’t you rather I came to yours?
PETER, AS DUDLEY
That is more than I have ever allowed myself to hope; you see, hope is sustainable only when its object seems attainable.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Is that an aphorism?
PETER, AS DUDLEY
I think it is.
PATTI, AS ELLA
Well, here I am, attainable.
She looks into his eyes.  He looks into hers.  They are breathing excitedly, their mouths nearly touching, and then she kisses him, and it is thrilling for both of them, but she draws away from him, and, as Patti, not Ella, says:
PATTI (CONT’D.)
Before we go any further with this, I’d like to meet your mother.
CUT TO:
INFLATING A DOG SCREENPLAY | CONTENTS | CHAPTER 9

Candi Lee Manning and Alec "Nick" RafterHere are a couple of swell ideas from Eric Kraft's vivacious publicist, Candi Lee Manning.
 

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Copyright © 2001 by Eric Kraft
Registered with the Writers Guild of America East in 2001 

The screenplay for Inflating a Dog is a work of fiction. The characters, incidents, dialogues, settings, and businesses portrayed in it are products of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. 

All rights reserved. No part of this teleplay may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. 

The illustration at the top of the page is an adaptation of an illustration by Stewart Rouse that first appeared on the cover of the August 1931 issue of Modern Mechanics and Inventions. The boy at the controls of the aerocycle doesn’t particularly resemble Peter Leroy—except, perhaps, for the smile.

 
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LITTLE FOLLIES
HERB ’N’ LORNA
RESERVATIONS RECOMMENDED
WHERE DO YOU STOP?
WHAT A PIECE OF WORK I AM
AT HOME WITH THE GLYNNS
LEAVING SMALL’S HOTEL
INFLATING A DOG
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