| The Peter Leroy Television Series Pilot
Chapter 3 |
by Eric
Kraft
|
In Babbington, the series will run exclusively on
WCLM-TV.
THIRTY SECONDS OF
THIRTY SECONDS OF
THIRTY SECONDS OF
|
3. THERE’S A SMALL HOTEL, in which Pete and Al
launch a plan to save the hotel and Curt launches a scheme to get it back.
MUSIC UP: “There’s
a Small Hotel,” Ella Fitzgerald’s version.
CUT TO:
A little Scotch?PETER(going behind the bar) Peter picks up nearly-empty bottles and examines their contents. He puts glasses on the bar and pours what there is.Fine.ALBERTINE Blended?PETER(as he pours) A crack of lightning. Albertine looks toward the window. A drop from above splashes into one glass. Another drop splashes into the other. Peter, observing this, grimaces.Whatever you’ve got.ALBERTINE . . . with a splash of water.PETER Thanks.ALBERTINE They move to the sofa, Albertine snuggles against Peter, and a nostalgic smile forms on Peter’s face.Why don’t we sit in front of the fire?PETER(to escape the leak) Remember when the ceiling fell down?PETER(cozily reminiscing) I do, but I’m not nostalgic about it.ALBERTINE(with a shudder) I just wanted to make the point that problems come and go.PETER Oh, they come, but they don’t go. It’s guests that don’t come. You do understand that we’re broke, don’t you?ALBERTINE Actually, we’re broker than broke . . .PETER(to brighten the mood) Silence. They look into the fire, take a sip of their drinks. Albertine snuggles against Peter.It’s not funny, Peter.ALBERTINE(a weariness in her voice) Sorry.ALBERTINE She presses her finger to his lips to stop him.No, you’re right. It was a mistake.PETER Forget it for tonight.ALBERTINE(with a little smile)Tell me a story. I don’t think I’ve ever told you about the daughter of Mr. Yummy . . . have I?PETER(thinking, grinning) Mmm, no, I don’t think you have.ALBERTINE(luxuriously, like a child anticipating the pleasure of a story at bedtime) MUSIC UP: “Memories of You.” Note: this old song will be the theme for Peter’s storytelling sequences.Well, let’s see . . . it was a night . . . in the spring . . . no . . . just at the start of summer . . . quite a few years ago . . . that wonderful sort of night when all of the summer is still ahead of you . . . and five of us were camping out in my back yard . . .PETER(slowly, recalling) A brief SILENT sequence as Peter tells his story: the flickering fire, Peter talking, Albertine smiling, Peter playing the parts of characters in his story. (We do not hear Peter’s story; we’ll hear it later.) CUT TO:
I think that’s mine.BIG WOMAN He hurries off. As he passes a newsstand, a meek, nervous, EMBEZZLER, sets a plain black carry-on bag down while he picks up the Babbington Reporter with the headline STOP THIEF! and his picture. With a fluid motion, Curt snatches the bag as he goes by and slips out the exit.Really? I could have sworn . . . Hey, you know what they say: “Many bags look alike.” . . . My mistake.CURT CUT TO:
Happy birthday, Curtis Small.CURT CUT TO:
Curtis slams the trunk, runs around to the driver’s door, jumps in, and slams the door.Hey, you! That’s my money.EMBEZZLER(none too bright) CUT TO:
It starts, and Curt makes his getaway, with the embezzler running after him until, exhausted, he sinks to his knees in the rain, crushed.Start. That’s all I ask. Just start.CURT(to the car) A dollar here, five there . . . twenty years . . . twenty years . . . twenty years with my hand in the till.EMBEZZLER(practically weeping) CUT TO:
CUT TO:
CUT TO:
You’re right . . . about the past.PETER DISSOLVE TO:
It’s a kind of getaway . . .PETER (CONT’D., V.O.) CUT TO:
YOUNG PETER’S POV: A drop of rainwater falls straight at him, right out of the starry sky, growing larger . . .. . . an escape . . .PETER (CONT’D., V.O.) CUT TO:
Another drop.What was that?ALBERTINE What was what?PETER That sound.ALBERTINE Another drop: splat.Sound?PETER You mean that sound?PETER The roof is leaking, isn’t it?ALBERTINE(sighing) Nothing we can do about it tonight.PETER Couldn’t you put a tarp over it?ALBERTINE The wind would blow it off the roof. In fact, the wind would probably blow me off the roof. Of course, if you insist . . .PETER Forget it.ALBERTINE Silence.I’m sorry I got you into this.PETER He turns the light off. A moment passes.We’ll put the place on the market.PETER Another moment passes.Aren’t you going to say something like, “I don’t think we should give up yet”?PETER Al?PETER MUSIC UP: The Persuasions singing “Drip Drop” from Comin’ at Ya: “The roof is leakin’ and the rain’s pourin’ on my head,” or the Videos singing “Trickle, Trickle.”I don’t think we should give up yet.ALBERTINE(with a sigh) CUT TO:
INT. MORNING. PETER AND ALBERTINE’S BEDROOM. Sun is
pouring through the window. It’s going to be a beautiful day. Peter is
already up and nearly dressed. Albertine’s still in bed.
Al, I . . . well . . . I’m convinced that . . . we really should sell.PETER(hesitantly) Sell? Why on earth would we do that? Because the possibility of turning a profit on this place vanished years ago? Because every day we slide deeper into a hole? Because . . .ALBERTINE Yeah, that’s why.PETER I don’t think we should give up yet.ALBERTINE(with a secret smile)(she has a plan)Last night, for a while, all my cares and worries were gone . . . just gone! While you were asleep?PETER Oh, no. My dreams are scary. Bankers, plumbers, mortgages, leaks . . .ALBERTINE When then?PETER(to stop her) When you were telling me that story.ALBERTINE Really?PETER No worries, no kidding.ALBERTINE(crossing her heart) So, you’re suggesting that I tell you a story every night, pull you back into the past to take your cares away?PETER I’m suggesting that you tell our guests a story every night to take their cares away.ALBERTINE Guests?PETER(looking around) You’re going to bring them in . . . you and your stories. You’re going to be the draw, the entertainment . . . or your stories are: an antidote to care, an end to all distress.ALBERTINE And you think this is going to work?PETER Sure I do . . . I hope.ALBERTINE Al . . . I know you love my stories, and I love you for loving my stories, but people are not going to come here to listen to me.PETER They might . . .ALBERTINE I don’t tell the kind of story people want to hear. I try to smile at life, but people want stories from the catalog of human misery, they want sad stories of the deaths of kings . . .PETER CUT TO:
EXT. PETER’S MEMORY. HIS NEIGHBORHOOD. 1957. Morning.
Police cars and an ambulance are pulled up across the street, at the Jerrolds’
house. Neighbors have gathered in pajamas and robes, shocked, murmuring,
gossiping. EMERGENCY WORKERS bring Mrs. Jerrold out on a stretcher, dead.
Young Peter, stunned, draws near, stares at her face.
CUT TO:
INT. THE PRESENT. Peter drops to the bed, stunned
by the memory.
. . . the death of . . . Mrs. Jerrold.PETER Who?ALBERTINE Mrs. Jerrold. She lived across the street from me. She killed herself. It’s a long story . . . about . . . her . . . and Mr. Yummy . . . and Porky White and Kap’n Klam and the flying-saucer detector I built and the cave I dug and the spying I did . . .PETER A story that people would come here to listen to you tell?ALBERTINE They embrace.I could tell it in parts . . . one part a night.PETER(inspired) We can advertise on “Baldy’s Nightcap”!PETER(inspired again) I thought we could post some flyers.ALBERTINE(thinking of the cost) Come on. If this is our last shot, let’s make it our best shot, and . . . I can raise some cash to pay for it.PETER CUT TO:
INT. THE BOAT WHERE CURT HAS TAKEN SHELTER.
Curt awakens. He stretches, yawns, rubs his stubble, and immediately
thinks of the suitcase. He opens it. He grins.
CUT TO:
EXT. THE BOAT YARD. Peter arrives in a handsome antique
mahogany Chris-Craft runabout called Baby. His longtime friend “RASKOL”
LODKOCHNIKOV owns the boat yard.
Hey, Peter, how’re things?RASKOL Not so good, to tell you the truth.PETER Something wrong?RASKOL Raskol reaches for his wallet.You name it. . . . But Al’s got an idea, and I think it might just work. . . . The thing is, I need some cash.PETER No, no. I came to make a deal.PETER (CONT’D.)(he indicates Baby) For Baby?RASKOL I thought I might trade down.PETER(indicating an old clam boat nearby) CUT TO:
EXT. THE BOAT WHERE CURT IS HIDING. He lifts the tarp
and looks around. He spots Peter and Raskol, looking the clam boat over,
regards them curiously for a moment, then drops his suitcase to the ground,
slips down the ladder and slinks off toward town, unnoticed.
CUT TO:
EXT. BABBINGTON. A FEW MINUTES LATER. Curt is walking
along and comes to the heart of town, the intersection of Bolotomy Road
and Main Street. He looks around. He walks along Main.
He sees a sign in a window one flight up above Jeffrey’s Realty: ROOM FOR
RENT. He opens the door and starts up the dark, narrow stairway.
CUT TO:
EXT. RASKOL’S BOAT YARD: Peter and Raskol strike a
deal and shake hands on it.
CUT TO:
EXT. BOLOTOMY BAY. Peter at the wheel of the clam
boat. He looks at a small wad of cash, sighs, puts it in his pocket.
CUT TO:
INT. RADIO BROADCASTING STUDIO, THE PRESENT. Shabby
studio. Skeleton crew, bored. It is late, and probably no one is listening,
but CEDRIC “LOU” ABBOT (whose professional name is BOB BALDUCCI) is doing
his nightly late-late show, “Baldy’s Nightcap,” starring his dummy, BALDY.
Baldy himself, bald, old, and chipped, is sitting on a shelf. Lou sits
at the microphone. Baldy is the star. Lou has been reduced to playing Bob,
second-banana to a dummy. He’s a broadcasting has-been, sixtyish and grumpy.
He plays both Bob and Baldy, altering his natural voice for both. WHEN
LOU IS BROADCASTING, WE NEVER SEE ENOUGH OF HIM TO KNOW THAT HE IS LOU.
Say, we’ve got a new advertiser tonight. Pretty exciting, eh Bob?BALDY Yeah.BOB(wearily) Small’s Hotel, “The Little Hotel Without a Slogan.” Pretty clever, huh, Bob?BALDY Yeah.BOB Folks, here’s a special invitation from the innkeeper, Albertine Gaudet . . .BALDY CUT TO:
INT. SMALL’S HOTEL, PETER AND ALBERTINE’S BEDROOM.
Peter and Albertine are lying side-by-side in bed listening to “Baldy’s
Nightcap.” Their hopes are riding on this.
. . . to come and visit Small’s Hotel on Small’s Island. Hey! That matches, Bob! Small’s Hotel, Small’s Island?BALDY (CONT’D. FROM RADIO) Yeah.BOB Your island getaway begins with a trip in a handsome launch.BALDY (CONT’D. FROM RADIO) CUT TO:
EXT. SMALL’S ISLAND DOCK. NIGHT. The old clam boat.
Leave your troubles behind, while you take refuge in Small’s Hotel, on Small’s Island.BALDY (CONT’D. FROM RADIO)(this appeals to him)(he’s got a cynical image to maintain)A little repetitious, isn’t it, Bob? Yeah.BOB You can go rowing or sailing . . .BALDY (CONT’D. FROM RADIO) CUT TO:
EXT. THE SHORELINE OF SMALL’S ISLAND, SAME TIME.
A rowboat is tied to the dock, and four small catboats are on moorings,
one partially underwater, all in poor repair.
CUT TO:
INT. THE BROADCASTING STUDIO.
. . . or just sit on the dock, watch the moonlight play on Bolotomy Bay, and let the world rattle on without you.BALDY (CONT’D.)(as if to Bob)We never stayed there, did we, Bob? No.BOB It sounds carefree, doesn’t it?BALDY Yeah.BOB CUT TO:
Well, now it’s even more carefree, because every night the assistant innkeeper is going to tell you a story, just like when you were a kid and didn’t have a thing to worry about.BALDY (V.O.)(a pause)Remember those days, Bob? CUT TO:
Yeah.BOB (V.O.) CUT TO:
I’m not so sure we’re getting the maximum enthusiasm from Bob and Baldy.ALBERTINE It sounds like a once-in-a-lifetime opportunity, folks! Don’t miss it!BALDY (FROM RADIO)(heavy sarcasm) Good night, Baldy. Good night, Bob. Good night, my love.ALBERTINE(switching the radio off) CUT TO:
|
||
 Here
are a couple of swell ideas from Eric Kraft's vivacious publicist, Candi
Lee Manning.
You'll find more swell ideas from Candi Lee here. |
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Copyright © 2002 by Eric
Kraft
The scripts for The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy Television Series are works of fiction. The characters, incidents, dialogues, settings, and businesses portrayed in it are products of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this teleplay may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. The illustration at the top of the page is an adaptation of an illustration by Stewart Rouse that first appeared on the cover of the August 1931 issue of Modern Mechanics and Inventions. The boy at the controls of the aerocycle doesn’t particularly resemble Peter Leroy—except, perhaps, for the smile. |
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