| The Peter
Leroy Television Series Pilot
Chapter 19, The Negative Test, in which Peter gets a little respect |
by Eric
Kraft
|
In Babbington, the series will run exclusively on
WCLM-TV.
|
EXT. BABBINGTON. THE KAP’N KLAM CLAM BAR. LATER
THAT DAY. Peter arrives on his bicycle, with the saucer detector
in the basket. He takes the detector inside.
CUT TO:
INT. THE CLAM BAR. It’s a rough-and-ready place.
PORKY WHITE has plans for it, but so far it’s not much more than a shack.
Porky is a big guy, in his late twenties. He has known Peter for
years, ever since the days when Porky drove a school bus and Peter rode
it. Peter climbs onto a stool at the counter and sets the detector
in front of him.
Nice work. Very nice. What is it?PORKY(genuinely impressed)It’s a flying-saucer detector.YOUNG PETERAh! Flying-saucer detector! . . . How does it work?PORKYWell, first I have to get it aligned.PETER
He pauses. If Porky is going to scoff at the whole idea, this is the point at which he will do it.There. Now, if a flying saucer passes by, it will disturb the magnetic field . . .PETER (CONT’D.) They both look at the detector for a while. Nothing happens.Because of the anti-gravity drive, I suppose.PORKY(folding his arms across his chest and nodding)(thoughtfully)As I see it, the engine in the saucer, undoubtedly employing power source unknown on earth, would cause a local disturbance in the magnetic field, which would deflect the compass needle from its normal orientation.Right.YOUNG PETER(relieved)The needle would swing and touch the wire, the current would flow, and the bulb would light.PORKY(taking it very seriously)Right.YOUNG PETERIndicating the presence of a flying saucer in the vicinity.PORKYRight.YOUNG PETER He passes the magnet over the detector. The needle swings, and the lamp lights.How do you know it’s working?PORKYWell, there are two tests.YOUNG PETER(producing a magnet)This is the positive test. Peter puts the magnet away. The needle settles down and aligns itself north-to-south, resting in the center of the wire circle, with the lamp unlit.Wow.PORKY Porky comes around the end of the counter, walks across the room, sticks his head outside and scans the sky.This is the negative test.YOUNG PETEROh. I get it.PORKY Amazing! Amazing! It really works! There isn’t a saucer in sight!PORKY (CONT’D.)(in a booming voice) CUT TO:
INT. SMALL’S HOTEL LOUNGE. Peter’s audience is appreciative,
and his heart is warmed by their attention.
CUT TO:
INT. SMALL’S HOTEL LOUNGE. A FEW HOURS LATER.
The group is enjoying Albertine’s impression of Mr. Fillmore.
Albertine takes Peter by the hand and leads him toward the stairs. At the stairs, she pauses.I’m gonna go do some recon.ALBERTINE(as Fillmore)Oh! Oh! That reminds me! Jeffrey-somebody called. A realtor?SUKI(plastered, giggling)Oh! What did he say?ALBERTINE(eagerly)He said, “Please tell Albertine that Mr. Fillmore felt that the terrain wasn’t rugged enough.”SUKITell that woman her terrain ain’t rugged enough.ALBERTINE(as Fillmore)He said, “I suggested that the terrain could be artificially altered . . .”SUKIOf course. Why not?ALBERTINE(as herself)“. . . but he said that you could always tell when terrain had been artificially altered.”SUKIHe’s wrong about that. I altered the terrain in my family’s back yard when I was a kid, and it was very convincing. In fact . . .PETER“And anyway it would be ‘too much trouble.’”SUKI(must deliver her message)They’re not making fanatics the way they used to.ALBERTINE(shaking her head) Good night, Suki . . . and sleep well . . . and have pleasant dreams . . . and tomorrow will be a better day.ALBERTINE(to Suki, tenderly) CUT TO:
|
||
 Here
are a couple of swell ideas from Eric Kraft's vivacious publicist, Candi
Lee Manning.
You'll find more swell ideas from Candi Lee here. |
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Copyright © 2002 by Eric
Kraft
The scripts for The Personal History, Adventures, Experiences & Observations of Peter Leroy Television Series are works of fiction. The characters, incidents, dialogues, settings, and businesses portrayed in it are products of the author’s imagination and are not to be construed as real. Any resemblance to actual events or persons, living or dead, is entirely coincidental. All rights reserved. No part of this teleplay may be reproduced or transmitted in any form or by any means, electronic or mechanical, including photocopying, recording, or by any information storage and retrieval system, without permission in writing from the author. The illustration at the top of the page is an adaptation of an illustration by Stewart Rouse that first appeared on the cover of the August 1931 issue of Modern Mechanics and Inventions. The boy at the controls of the aerocycle doesn’t particularly resemble Peter Leroy—except, perhaps, for the smile. |
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